Value of Friends
they worth more than you realize?).
asked, we would all probably agree that having friendships is
very important and not only is important, but its usually
fun, right? I mean, we have the opportunity to talk about the latest
guy or girl we like, we get to go do things with our friends, they
make us laugh and feel special and accepted.
But is that
what being friends is all about? Chatting about relationships
and laughing? Or does being a friend mean something else, too
does it carry special responsibilities? I think that when we say
that were a friend to someone, then we need to do all we can
to help make sure our friend is safe and happy. Being a friend,
to me, means asking if our friend are okay and genuinely trying
to help them through tough times.
One of the hardest
parts of being a friend is being sworn to secrecy and then being
told something that our friends are being deliberately hurt by someone
(such as being abused) or that they are choosing to do something
that is dangerous to themselves (such as drugs). We've sworn not
to tell but our hearts know that the situation they are in is bad
What do we
dont want to risk having them get angry at us and ending the
friendship and yet its tough going through each day knowing
that they are being raped or hit or turning to cocaine or ecstasy.
We dont want to lose their trust or make it a bigger deal
than it maybe really is but we also dont want to wonder about
whether or not our choice to remain silent is the right one. From
everything in my life, to all the troubles I have heard from other
people, I can say that true friends find the courage to talk, to
reveal those dangerous secrets.
are aware of it or not, people who tell friends about the serious
situations they are in, are asking for help. People who do drugs
usually do not try to hide that fact from anyone but the police
and their parents. Their friends, though, usually know that they
are on drugs. The friend who told the others the situation did so
because they really want help.
they come out and say they need help, then?
kind of hard to grasp, but people who are in dangerous situations
often dont really believe anyone cares about them and/or they
dont believe that they can be helped. It may also be that
they are afraid of having their parents find out the truth. Sometimes
when were really, really hurting we cant help ourselves.
We try to by saying, "My dad does stuff to me" or "Yeah,
I do all kinds of drugs at the raves" or "My boyfriend
gets mad easily" or by letting the cuts weve made on
ourselves visible to other people. We try to help ourselves but
sometimes we cant because it feels as though fear of the unknown
has us caged. So, because we cant pull ourselves up into the
healing light, we can only hope that our friends will help us.
Once we, as
friends, decide that the secret weve been told must be told,
the next step is actually telling someone. Sometimes its as
easy as going to your school counselor or youth minister, but sometimes
we have to tell our parents the problem and let them take it from
there. Our friends may become angry at first and may say things
that they really dont mean. Some may even end the friendship
but the real question that we need to ask ourselves is, "Would
I rather lose the friendship or their life?" because if the
secrets involves self-harm, drugs, abuse or activity that we know
is dangerous, then if its not stopped, it will eventually
take their life, or their spirit.
Being a true
friend, then, means putting their well-being above even the
friendship because in the long run, it will save a life. Not only
that but you will know that you cared enough about your friend to
do something (talk) that was hard for you to do.
The Bible says
that we are all brothers and sisters and we know that the ultimate
act of love and friendship took place when Christ died on the cross
for us. Likewise, todays friendships may require some sacrifice
but in the long run, we wont have to live with regret and
well have played part in helping to show our friends the way
back to health and happiness.